You may or may not remember a while back I put up a post about a lesbian highschooler in Mississippi who was banned from her prom. If you forgot, shame on you. Well she is back in the news because she was awarded $35,000 in compensation, plus legal fees. I am happy for Constance, she got a raw deal with the whole prom thing, but I can’t get over one aspect of the story. She really seems to have let herself go. I would have sought more money, a lot more. And for the life of me, I can’t really think of her doing anything else with the money besides hitting the drive-thru at KFC twice a day. I’m not trying to be a jerk, maybe I am, but have a little respect for yourself….or at least sue for more money because it’s obvious that this ordeal took it’s toll. Now, I know what you’re saying out there and I agree, $35,000 in Mississippi is like being a millionaire. This is true but that money won’t buy happiness, especially in Mississippi.
* For the record: I completely endorse a lesbian prom scenario…100%
This is way beyond standard cameltoe, and I approve (big time). But it’s a hybrid camel for sure. Any bathing suit as thin as that will inevitably produce some kind of camel result, why not call it “foot”.
I came across something equally fascinating and disgusting. It’s a cookbook filled with semen-based recipes (fight the gag reflex). I’m not fucking kidding, it exists, and you can purchase one for your girlfriend’s birthday at the bargain price of $24.95 and have it on your doorstep in 3-5 business days. I’m not quite sure about the emotions rushing through me right now. On one hand, it is hilarious and makes for a hell of a gift. On the other hand, it is really being put to use by someone in a kitchen somewhere. They have a counter-top filled with flour, baking soda, sugar, vanilla extract and semen. One recipe, for meringue, simply substitutes ‘cream of tartar’ for ‘cream of man’, I am not making this stuff up folks. If someone ever tried to serve me a Banana-Walnut-Semen Muffin, I would look them in the eyes, with my serious face, and say “you take the first bite.” While they struggle with the first bite (because it’s fucking semen) I would slap them in the mouth and run. I guess I don’t really have to flee the scene, but it has more effect.
Viagra for chicks! I will buy it for my girlfriend…when I get one. This is quite a developing story and I will be paying close attention. The ironic part of all of this is that the drug was originally produced as an anti-depressant, didn’t work, but managed to boost libido in most females. This is truly the beauty of science and I will continue to champion moves like this throughout the lab-coat world. Big ups to the doctors behind this discovery and I’m sure all of the boyfriends out there with dead-fish girlfriends will be all over this shit for their ladies. Science is good, be thankful.
Who was the first jackass to tell a woman to cover her breasts? I know he is dead and gone but we should find his grave and dig him up, pee on him, then bury him again. What on earth was that man thinking? If anything: men should not be allowed to go topless in public, seriously.
I saw Tori Black’s right tit (her right, my left) from roughly 12 feet away and it was undeniably the highlight of my weekend. Exxxotica was a blast and if you didn’t make it, boooooo. There were girls every which way you looked and most of them scantily clad for your viewing pleasure. Sunday was very low-key but Alexis Texas managed to brighten up the convention center with a kick-ass roller derby outfit straight out of the ’70’s; purple and gold, amazing. The girls were extremely nice and everyone was smiling, except Jenna Haze, who continues to have that ‘bad mustard’ look…what is that?!
If you are within a 200 mile radius of Miami Beach, Fl – get your ass to Exxxotica, 5 minutes ago. This is your chance to meet all of those hotties you drool over constantly. No shame, I drool too. So get off of your ass and get on the Florida Turnpike or I-95 and head south. This really is a convention for the fans, and at Nude Reviews we love the fans more than any other site. You guys make the industry what it is and without you we’d have nothing. To the victor go the spoils…so go get your picture taken with Jayden James or Tori Black or any other amazingly hot girl from the adult industry. Remember, boners are encouraged and condoned there :p
Tori Black will be chatting live tonight on ImLive.com and I think that anyone who reads this post should click here and get their ass signed up for a membership. This is one of those rare opportunities and you would be remiss to sit this one out. Tori is as good as it gets and one of these days she will come to her senses and finally call me back. I’m not sweating it, we had a good thing going for a while but we went our separate ways…