Horror Lurking Behind Every Link On The Internet

Like a supple flower…

I clicked on a link today that said, “Are my labia normal?”  This image [above] popped up on the new page and scared the crap out of me.  I jumped in my chair.  Now I know what you are thinking, “why did he click on that link?”, and the answer is that I click on everything.  I wanna know if my labia are normal and I wanna know now.  Okay, I know that I don’t have any labia, but I thought for sure I might see a close-up snatch shot…this is what I got.  There is nothing beautiful about that image, nothing.  I know it’s a flower but it’s really damn scary.

Breanne Benson interview cont.

Breanne Benson: Hello?

NudeReviews: Hey Breanne, it’s Mack at NudeReviews.com, how are you?

Breanne Benson: Oh hi, how are you?

NR: I’m good, I’m good. How’s everything going, alright?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, everything’s great. I’m sorry, wasn’t I, was I supposed to call you or…

NR: I don’t know, do you want me to hang up? You can call back.

Breanne Benson: Oh no, no, no. [Laughs] No, no, it’s okay.

NR: No, we um, we got your number earlier via email so I just assumed we’d give you a buzz. Is that cool?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, no, that’s totally perfect, yeah.

NR: Okay, so what’s going on? What have you been up to lately?

Breanne Benson: Um, not much, I just back in from Jamaica last night. I um, had a little vacation so that was good.

NR: Very nice, very nice. Who’d you go to Jamaica with?

Breanne Benson: Um, just my sister. Yeah.

NR: Oh that’s cool.

Breanne Benson: It was a very relaxing vacation.

NR: Where’d you guys go? Montego or Negril?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, we went to Montego Bay.

NR: Oh that’s awesome.

Breanne Benson: Yeah.

NR: Are you, uh, still rocking the blonde hair or are you back to black? What’s going on there?

Breanne Benson: You know what, I do have the blonde hair but actually tweeted last night that I wanted to go back to dark.

NR: I’m going to tell you the truth, alright? I mean, I think you look hot as a blonde but I like the black much better.

Breanne Benson:  Do you? Yeah, I think…I like having the blonde but I’ve had it for like five years now but it’s so much maintenance, it’s just getting…

NR: That’s a pain in the ass.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, it’s such a pain in the ass. I’m so over it.

NR: Well I think you should go back to black tonight.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs] Tonight.

NR: Tonight, that’s right.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, no. It’s going to be a while before I go back but not that…I mean, I’m going to do it very, very soon but I’m still a little nervous about it.

NR: No, it’s all good. Like I said, it still looks good either way so don’t worry.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: So um, how did you find your way into adult entertainment, I gotta know.

Breanne Benson:  Um, well, I started back in ’03.

NR: Okay…

Breanne Benson:  And I just…somehow I knew people in the industry and just kinda I guess…my friends started doing it so it looked like fun so I figured I’d try it and I quit in ’04. Then I started dancing at the Rhino (??), and then I decided to come back in June of ’09.

NR: And then go back into it? Oh, okay. Oh! So just recently you got back in?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, so it’s been like almost a year.

NR: What do you um, what do all your friends think? I mean, like the ones that knew you before you got into it? I mean, were they supportive? Jealous? Spiteful? I mean, what was the overall reaction?

Breanne Benson: Um, honestly, I didn’t really care if they made like

NR: Okay.

Breanne Benson:  Any comments or anything like that. But like, even though people were like “Oh my god, I can’t believe Benson’s doing that. Like, they were kind of shocked, which I don’t blame them, you know, but uh, as far as I know, you know, everyone’s been really cool with it so…

NR: That’s awesome, no like, that makes it a lot easier for you, right?

Breanne Benson: Oh, definitely, definitely.

NR: Now, you used to only do girl/girl scenes, right? Initially, but now you’ve started boy/girl, right?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, yeah, and I did girl/girl too um, when I came back until November of ’09 so I haven’t done girl/girl for like 6 months

NR: Do you like it so far?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, no, everything’s been great, it’s been a lot of fun.

NR: How come you initially only done the girl/girl?

Breanne Benson: Um, actually, when I first started I only did solos for the first six months. Um, I don’t know, I just really like taking small steps in everything that I do, for some reason so I always want to like, try things out and then I was like “okay, I think I’m ready now” and then after I did the videos and then you know, I just like to take things slow.

NR: I think that’s a good move in this industry. I think when you see a lot of girls jump right in, all the way, right out the gates, too young sometimes and it can really just take a toll, you know.

Breanne Benson:  Yeah, definitely.

NR: So what’s been um, what’s been the best part about all of it so far?

Breanne Benson: Um, everything. I mean, it’s been great. I think this time around I have more support from my family members too, that also makes such a big difference, you know what I mean? Cause I started a lot younger.

NR: No, yeah, that makes it a lot easier.

Breanne Benson: So yeah, this time it’s been a lot more smoother, it’s been fun. Everything’s been great.

NR: Oh that’s awesome, what about the downside? I mean, what’s your least favorite aspect to the business or should I say like, if you could change one thing about the industry, what would it be?

Breanne Benson: Ah, if I could change one thing…ah, no one’s ever asked me that before. That’s a good question.

NR: Thank you.

Breanne Benson: Um, I would have to say, oh dear, that’s a really good question. I have no idea…

NR: You wouldn’t change anything?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, uh, I mean, I think just the way it is is just fine, I think it’s maybe it’s I’m so used to it, it’s just like…I don’t really see anything that has to change, I mean I would like to see the magazines. Um, I know they’re not as popular now as they were back in ’03, like they’re not doing as good. Like, I would like to see that, you know.

NR: It’s tough with the internet now, you know.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, it’s all internet. I wish it was, you know, a little bit of both but I mean, whatever.

NR: But I think with the internet you’re going to reach more people than you are with print though.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, that’s true.

NR: So I mean, it has its pluses too, I mean. And for you and everybody else in the business doing what you do, I think, in the long run, I think it can only help add to your success so.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, no, that’s definitely true but it’s a lot of fun doing the magazines.

NR: You like doing that a little bit better, huh?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, those were a lot of fun, yeah.

NR: So where do you live these days, for the most part?

Breanne Benson: I actually live in Sun City. I moved there from Orange County in January so yeah.

NR: Do you like it?

Breanne Benson: Um, it’s growing on me. I know I said I’d never move to Los Angeles ‘cause I just, I hate the traffic here and everything, but you know, it’s kind of growing on me.

NR: Does it make it a lot easier for work too?

Breanne Benson:  Oh, definitely. Driving from Orange County to L.A. all the time, it’s like a six hour drive. Like, three to go to L.A. and then three back ‘cause of the traffic and you’re seriously like spending five hours in the car. It’s seriously not worth it.

NR: That’s terrible! I could never do that, that’s awful.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, that’s why I had to move out of there A.S.A.P.

NR: Well, tell me about your upbringing. You weren’t born in America, right?

Breanne Benson: No, I’m from Albania.

NR: That’s right, that’s what I’ve been told. Um, how was that like, how long were you there?

Breanne Benson: I was there until I was like five years old and um, then we moved to Italy until I was seven and then we came to the U.S.

NR: Oh wow.

Breanne Benson: So we’ve been here since like, forever.

NR: So you’re pretty much like a Southern California girl then, for the most part?

Breanne Benson:  Yeah, definitely.

NR: Alright, but I still gotta do it. I’m going to give you an Albanian history exam.

Breanne Benson: Okay, uh-oh.

NR: I’m expecting an A from you, so don’t let me down.

Breanne Benson: Oh no, I might fail. I’m not too familiar but go ahead.

NR: I don’t, hey, I don’t want your fans to be disappointed, alright?

Breanne Benson: [Laughs] Alright.

NR: Alright, what year did Albania gain independence from the Ottoman Empire?

Breanne Benson: Um, fuck my life.

NR: [Laughs]

Breanne Benson: Um, wasn’t that like in the 1990s or something like that?

NR: No, no, it was a long time ago. I mean, not too long. Almost a hundred years ago.

Breanne Benson: Oh, I’m thinking when it stopped being Communist, I think.

NR: Oh yeah, that would be the early 90s. Yeah.

Breanne Benson: Okay, um that I definitely don’t know. If was before I was born, I have not a fucking clue.

NR: It was 1912 so it was a while before you were born but I thought you might know that one.

Breanne Benson: I know [laughs]. You know, I’m sure my parents have said something but I sure as hell did not pay attention at all.

NR: Oh boy. Alright, what is the capital city of Albania?

Breanne Benson: Um, Tirana. I was born there so I know that one.

NR: Alright, well done, well done.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: Alright, who took over as leader of Albania following World War II?

Breanne Benson: Fuck. Does the name start with a B? B-oh fuck, I don’t remember his name. Uh, I can’t pronounce it. I think it starts with the letter B. Oh no, Offa Hoxha or something?

NR: Enver Hoxha! That was close, I’m going to give you a half credit on that.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: I’m going to give you half credit. Alright, what’s the highest mountain in Albania?

Breanne Benson: I have no idea.

NR: Oh, this is getting bad. I thought you were going to ace this thing, what happened?!

Breanne Benson: I, you know, I’ve been here for so long that I just. I never, I mean, when I speak Albanian too, I have an English accent to it.

NR: Oh boy.

Breanne Benson: I’m completely like, I don’t know much about Albania. I can barely speak to my aunt on the phone, I’m just like…

NR: That’s still pretty cool that you can speak it, though. I’m impressed.

Breanne Benson:  Yeah, no, I can still speak it but I just, I sound so dumb and I cannot read in Albanian, just a little bit, and I cannot write. Like, I can read something, it’s really weird.

NR: That’s still cool. You can speak a couple of different languages though. Not many people can do that, so that’s still impressive.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, well, I wish I could remember them ‘cause I used to know Italian too ‘cause I started first grade in Italy and I used to know it fluently but now I can’t even speak a word. Like, I have no idea what to say.

NR: You’ve got to get back in touch with your linguistic roots. I want you speaking fluent Italian, fluent Albanian.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: Writing, reading, the whole nine yards, okay?

Breanne Benson: I got so confused learning English ‘cause I also learned Spanish when I came here. I went to a bilingual elementary school where every other day you had to speak Spanish.

NR: That’s crazy!

Breanne Benson: Yeah, I was like eight years old speaking four languages. When I like talked to my parents, I’d have like, in one sentence I’d have like four languages. It was so confusing to me.

NR: Well, the good news is they speak English pretty much everywhere. The bad news is you got one and a half out of four on your quiz.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: But I’m going to let you slide and the next time we talk, I’m going to put together another quiz and I want you to be ready for it, alright?

Breanne Benson: Okay.

NR: Did you, were you out at AVN this year?

Breanne Benson: I was, I was there. I was signing for um, Fire TV.

NR: Okay.

Breanne Benson: Yeah.

NR: And um, you got to see all the fans? Were they pretty stoked to see you?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, it was fun, it was good. I also did um, their expo in um, Mexico City.

NR: Uh huh. Oh, what was that like?

Breanne Benson: That one was absolutely insane.

NR: I believe it.

Breanne Benson: And it was nothing compared to the AVN out here in Vegas. It was, I mean there are over like a hundred thousand people that go.

NR: Jesus.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, and like, the girls had to like, have body guards at all times because there were so many people.

NR: Yeah, Mexico’s a little crazy, for sure.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, yeah.

NR: It’s not like, in Mexico City, it’s not like in Cancun or Cabo, it’s, I mean, it can be a little dangerous so.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, yeah, so I mean, we were safe and all, but there were just so many people. It was like, it was absolutely insane.

NR: That’s good though, that’s still a good experience though. Plus, you get to see, you know, international fans, things like that. That’s a good, that’s still good.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, no, it was great, it was a lot of fun.

NR: So um, so what’s your next move? What’s on the plate right now?

Breanne Benson: Um, I just tend to go with the flow of things. So my next move is to try and um, get my website started. I’m kind of lagging on that a little bit.

NR: Just putting together content for that?

Breanne Benson: I’m sorry?

NR: Oh, you’re just trying to put together content for that or are you still in the beginning stages?

Breanne Benson: Um, I’m still in the very beginning talks. We’re still like talking about it and stuff so it’ll definitely be up by the end of the year. It’s just, it’s actually getting to it, and then, you know, next thing would maybe hopefully start feature dancing. I just, you know, I wanted to wait before I started feature dancing because just to like bring my name out again, you know what I mean?

NR: No, that’s a good way to do it, right?

Breanne Benson: Yeah, so, that’s pretty much the next step for now.

NR: That’s awesome. I know, I’m sure you’re going to keep busy. I know it’s a constant rollercoaster. I get to talk to a lot of girls and they’re kinda always on the go and they’ve always got something new going on, so I know you guys are never really…you don’t get too much downtime.

Breanne Benson: Yeah, yeah, definitely, it’s true.

NR: Well, it’s a good thing. I uh, well, I’m going to let you get going but I hope I can check with you again down the road and we can uh, we can see how things are going then but um, I really appreciate you giving us some time today. And um, I just want to let you know, everybody at Nude Reviews loves you and we wish you the best, okay?

Breanne Benson: Thank you. Okay, I’m going to call my mom and get some more info on Albania so next time I’ll be prepared. [Laughs]

NR: Absolutely. I might even learn Albanian and then we can do another interview in Albanian.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs]

NR: And we’ll be the only two people on the internet that can understand it.

Breanne Benson: [Laughs] Alright, well, it’s been great talking to you, thank you.

NR: Alright Breanne, take care. Thank you.

Breanne Benson: Alright, bye.

What Is The World Coming To?

Sorry if this ruins your Friday.  If it does, take solace in the fact that it already destroyed my entire weekend.  The nerve of this guy though, no smile or wink – not even a slight wide-eyed expression – nothing.  This guy is an ungrateful mess and I cannot believe he has his own website.  He is an Italian Hoagie personified and he should be grinning ear to ear whenever a woman is on his lap (naked or not).  I’m not saying that this girl is a 10, by any means, but she is certainly not a 1.  She is like an 11 for him.  A 1 is all that this slob of a man deserves…so unsettling.

I Know One Chick Who Could Take That Down…

Does anyone think this is offensive?  If you walked by this shop window and noticed the giant penis on display, would you really be that upset?  Apparently enough people in this tiny British village found it to be unnerving.  Personally, I think it serves as motivation for all men who happen to cruise by on the sidewalk.  And for women, my goodness, it could probably be instantaneously orgasm-inducing.  I thought the Euros were all about this sort of thing.  They run some wild programs on public television and on paper seem to be light years ahead of Americans in the sexually enlightened department.  Perhaps the old guard found it to be truly gross in nature and demanded that the giant penis statue be taken down from the window.  If I had that thing, I would put it on my desk as a paperweight…then again, I work at NudeReviews and most people would probably want their picture taken with it a la Santa Claus at the mall.  That thing is like the cock version of Easter Island statues.  Imagine that; had Captain Cook landed on Easter Island and instead of giant head statues…penises.  Penis upon giant penis lining the beach; I would have freaked.


I Got Two Penises And A Microphone…

A real gift from God…

I just read an article about a lizard with two penises.  Hemipene is the scientific terminology. I will simply refer to this phenomena as: amazing.  Am I jealous?  Of course I am.  Imagine being able to do DP to a girl and not have to worry about crossing swords with your buddy.  We all know how thin that area of skin between the snatch and the pooper can get.  And once there is a cock in each hole it is paper-thin!  With two penises I could get so much more accomplished in this lifetime.  I could pleasure girls like never before, probably get into Harvard business school and climb Mount Everest.  I know what you’re thinking; all of this with just an additional penis?  The answer is, yes.

Allie Haze Transcript…

Allie Haze: Hello?

Nude Reviews: Allie, hi! It’s Mack at Nude Reviews. How are you?

Allie Haze: I’m good, how are you?

NR: Sorry for running a little bit late, I apologize.

Allie Haze: It’s okay. [Laugh]

NR: So how are you? What are you up to?

Allie Haze: Uh, nothing, just watching the races right now.

NR: The race?

Allie Haze: Yeah, the NASCAR Nationwide Race Bowl.

NR: You’re a NASCAR Fan?

Allie Haze: Yeah. [Laugh]

NR: From Southern California and you like NASCAR?

Allie Haze: Yeah.

NR: Oh my god, that’s disappointing.

Allie Haze: [Laugh]

NR: You should be from Texas. You’re not like most Cali girls, I’ve noticed. You don’t have the platinum blonde hair, and the whole plastic look.  You’re pretty much like the girl-next-door kind of look.

Allie Haze: Uh, yes I am.

NR: Is that the plan going forward or do you think you might want to change things up?

Allie Haze: Uh, no, I’m probably not going to change anything.

NR: That’s about it. Okay. What’s the weather like today?

Allie Haze: Um, it’s really nice out here, really awesome.

NR: That’s nice. We’re in Miami so we’re used to good weather too, definitely.

Allie Haze: Oh, okay.  [Laugh]

NR: Yeah, absolutely. So how’d you find your way into the industry? How’d it all start?

Allie Haze: Uh, I actually, I’ve done modeling pretty much for the most part of my life and uh, I married and then divorced and then I kind of just did my own thing. And then I met the guy that I’m with now and I wanted to get back into it and he had known some people, just in general that…photos, any kind, both main stream and in the industry. And I, you know, was expressing that I wanted to get back into it and we had talked about it and he was like “Oh, well do you mind doing nude modeling?” and I was like “No, not at all, I’m totally cool”. So um, I was actually started doing the nude modeling and then, I was actually a lesbian before I became a bisexual.

NR: Really?

Allie Haze: Yeah, so I’ve always really been into girls and that’s always been a part of my life that I’ve never been willing to give up.

NR: Okay.

Allie Haze: So from there I just start doing, you know, I told them, well you know, I kind of want to start doing this girl-girl stuff, you know. It’s better than finding someone, ‘cause I used to work at a bar, you know, it’s better than hitting on girls at the bar and bringing them home .

NR: It’s a little bit easier, right?

Allie Haze: [Laugh] Yeah.

NR: Exactly, it’s a guarantee, every time.

Allie Haze: Yeah, from there I just started doing girl-girl and then all of a sudden I started doing boy-girl and now I’m here.

NR: Just doing a little bit of everything now?

Allie Haze: Yeah.

NR: So what’s up with the last name? Are you like a Jenna Haze fan, or what?

Allie Haze: Uh, no, it has nothing to do with that. It’s actually, my fiancé’s last name is Haze and I knew nothing of porn before I started to work.

NR: Oh, that’s his actual last name?

Allie Haze: Yeah.

NR: That’s pretty cool, I like it. Do you, um…

Allie Haze: Thank you.

NR: Do your parents know that you’re not just modeling anymore?

Allie Haze: Uh, yeah, my parents found out earlier this year.

NR: And are they supportive or…what’s up with that?

Allie Haze: Um, well, half my family is. My parents are divorced so half my family is kind of like it’s not the coolest thing in the world but it’s your life and you’re going to live it however you want to, you know. Just be careful, be safe and that’s about it. And then the other half is not so happy. [Laugh]

NR: Aw, well, ultimately it’s up to you so you know.

Allie Haze: Yeah, exactly.

NR: What um, so what do all your old friends think? Like, your high school friends? Do you have like any ex-boyfriends running around bragging that they used to get with a porn start?

Allie Haze: No, you know, I kind of don’t talk to anyone from high school or anything like that. I don’t really know anyone from my past, I guess you could say. It’s not necessarily my past but like from growing up I don’t really know or talk to anybody.

NR: You’ve severed all ties?

Allie Haze: Yeah, pretty much. I mean, I lived in such a small town growing up. It was either like get sucked in or get the fuck out.

NR: So you got the fuck out? I like it.

Allie Haze: Yeah, I got the fuck out. I did not want to be a hometown girl for the rest of my life.

NR: Nah, it’s a good move.

Allie Haze: I hear stories every now and then about people that are like, they were high school sweethearts, they’re still together and now how this girl is now dating her older brother. So now somehow they’re sisters and kind of related and I’m like “oh my god, I’m so glad I’m not a part of this anymore”.

NR: So it’s probably pickup truck involved somewhere along there too.

Allie Haze: Yeah, probably.

NR: Yeah, no, I’m glad you got out of there. So you’re 22 now, right?

Allie Haze: Yeah, I’m 22, my birthday is next month.

NR:  What’s it? May 10th, right?

Allie Haze: Yeah.

NR: Now, so, five years from now, you’re 27 years old. Where do you see yourself in the industry?

Allie Haze: Um, I don’t like to make predictions. I kind of like to live day-to-day and just go with the flow. Um, I don’t necessarily like have a, it sounds bad to say I don’t have a goal, but it’s not that I don’t have a goal, I just don’t want to put limitations and expectations on myself.

NR: I think that’s great. I like that.

Allie Haze: And yeah, not achieve them either way. So I’m kind of, like I said, I’m kind of just going with the flow and seeing what happens and what opportunities arise. So I try to jump on as quick as a I can and go from there.

NR: Absolutely. Did you um, did you go to AVN this year?

Allie Haze:  Yeah, actually, I was really lucky even being so new I got to sign so…

NR: Was that your first time there?

Allie Haze: Um, yeah, it’s the first time I’ve ever been. Um, I actually didn’t get to attend the awards um, ‘cause I was signing the next day and I didn’t want to go out and be out late all night and then not be ready to meet all my fans. I’m really big on my fans. Like, I love meeting my fans, I love doing events.

NR: Absolutely, you have to be.

Allie Haze: Yeah, I was actually the only girl, I was like the first girl on the floor and the only one that was there on time or awake on time.

NR: The fans will appreciate stuff like that, trust me.

Allie Haze: Yeah, and they really do, I was surprised.

NR: Do you uh, any performers that you met there that you hadn’t met before, like people you really look up to in the industry or people that maybe inspire you as you move forward?

Allie Haze: Um, you know, I haven’t really met anybody there, um, I didn’t really get to meet people. I’ve met, since there I’ve met people. Um, at Xbiz I met Tori Black for the first time. Everybody says that I look like I can be her little sister.

NR: Oh my god, that was my next question!

Allie Haze: Yeah, everybody says that I’m like pretty much her little sister. So…

NR: You look just like Tori Black.

Allie Haze: It’s pretty cool, it’s a cool compliment.

NR: You do, you look just like her. Maybe you’ll win as many AVNs as her next year, that’d be awesome.

Allie Haze: I know, who knows, it would be cool, um.

Allie Haze: Yeah, we got to meet and we took a picture together and it’s like really creepy but it’s really cool at the same time.

NR: I’d like to see that picture, I really would.

Allie Haze: Um, yeah, I posted it on Twitter. I can repost it. Hold on, my dogs are fighting. [To dogs] You guys, knock it off. Shush. [To Nude Reviews] Sorry.

NR: Nah, it’s alright, what kind of dogs?

Allie Haze: Wild animals! We just got a baby Rot [Rottweiler] and then I have an English Bulldog mix.

NR: That’s awesome, I like it.

Allie Haze: Yeah, they’re having a wrestling match.

NR: So you’re still living in California, right?

Allie Haze: Yeah, mhm, I’m still in California.

NR: Nice, who um, tell me someone that you’d like to work with that you haven’t worked with yet. Who would be like your…

Allie Haze: Guys or girls?

NR: Both.

Allie Haze: Um, well, I always say with girls it’s, right now with girls. Like I’d obviously love to work with Tori Black and it’s either Tori Black or Bobbi Starr, my two picks right now.

NR: You guys could do like a twin-sister thing.

Allie Haze: I know, it’s just up to somebody to put it together. I’m still so, it’s crazy because I’m, like I said, I’m new but I’m not. I’m 8 months in but [To dogs] Oh, stop it! Go outside now, both of you.

NR: Oh dear.

Allie Haze: I’m new, but I’m not. I haven’t shot for a lot of companies.

NR: Okay…

Allie Haze: So you know, I’m shooting for New Sensations for the first time this month.

NR: Yeah, like you said, just eight months into the biz, yeah.

Allie Haze: Yeah, so, you know, I tell some people I’m new and then I tell them eight months and they’re like “Oh, you ain’t new no more” and I’m like “Oh, okay?”

NR: [laughs] Yeah.

Allie Haze: Yeah, I kind of feel like I don’t know. Like it’s good and it’s bad, I mean, I haven’t shot for Zero, I haven’t shot for um, I haven’t shot for Bang [Bros.], I haven’t shot for a lot of companies, so…

NR: No, you’ve got some things to do then. You’ve got a to-do list for sure.

Allie Haze: Yeah, I know. My fans create little checklists.

NR: Nah, trust me, whatever you can do to keep them happy. What’s um, what’s something you can tell me that maybe your fans might not know about you already?

Allie Haze: I know, I get that question all the time. My answer is always I can touch my tongue to my nose? I mean, I don’t know, I don’t really…there’s not really much that I don’t, that I keep under wraps from my fans.

NR: You try to tell them everything?

Allie Haze: Yeah! I’m on Twitter 24/7. Um, I’m huge on the whole, you know, if you have questions, critiques or anything you’d like to say to me, go ahead and say it. I mean, I’ve got pretty thick skin.

NR: Mhm.

Allie Haze: Um, and my theory is, you know, if you expect to be an ass to me, expect an ass back. It’s just the way…

NR:  [Laughs] I like it, I like it.

Allie Haze: You know what I mean? It’s just the kind of person I am. If you want to be real with me and tell me that I suck at what I do, then rock on, you know. I’m gonna say thank you for your opinion, and you know, you better justify it, so…

NR: I certainly don’t think so, I think you rock at what you do so…

Allie Haze: Aw, well thank you! I’m like,

NR: So, you’ve got my vote.

Allie Haze: I’m a big critiquer. I like constructive criticism.

NR: Well it helps, yeah.

Allie Haze: Yeah, it does, and even in, before I started porn, I mean, I was, I’m a certified vet assistant and I was also an accountant.

NR: Oooh.

Allie Haze: So it’s like in the real world, I don’t call it…it’s so weird how like porn people talk. Like, I’m starting to pick up on the lingo too. It’s like “The Real World” and I’m like “Why do I say that?”

NR: Yeah, be careful.

Allie Haze: I know! I’m like “Why do I say that?” It sounds, it sounds so bad.

NR: Nah, it’s not bad.

Allie Haze: But when I had, you know, a desk job, it was like constructive criticism all the time. It’s all you got. So you had to learn to take it or you’d lose the job.

NR: Exactly, exactly.

Allie Haze: So, and that’s how I apply it for porn too. It’s like, I like constructive criticism if I’m doing that’s not attractive, you know, or if you feel I’m not…I mean, I truly believe you can be bad at porn.

NR: No, I think you’ve got the right approach for sure, and I think uh, if you take an approach like that, I think you’ll see the benefits and you’ll see the dividends down the road for sure.

Allie Haze: Yeah.

NR: Alright, I’m gonna throw a couple of quick ones at you and I want you to just tell me the first thing that pops into your head, okay?

Allie Haze: Okay…

NR: What’s your favorite cereal?

Allie Haze: Um, what’s it called? Frosted Wheaties? What are they called?

NR: Frosted Mini Wheats?

Allie Haze: Yeah!

NR: Okay.

Allie Haze: I got them on my fridge. I’m looking at my fridge right now. Frosted Mini Wheats, that’s what they’re called.

NR: What’s um, what’s your dream car?

Allie Haze: My dream car?

NR: Mhm.

Allie Haze: Oh wow, I haven’t thought about that in a while. Oh wait, I know this, a Hummer.

NR: A Hummer?

Allie Haze: Like the original ones.

NR: Oh, the old school, the military ones.

Allie Haze: Yeah, the old school. The military ones, the big, big ones.

NR: Um, what’s your favorite position?

Allie Haze: Oooh, it changes. [Laughs] I know I used to say doggie style but now I kind of like being on top.

NR: Hm, okay, that’s fine, there’s nothing wrong with that. What’s um, what’s your favorite food?

Allie Haze: Jalapeño poppers.

NR: Really?

Allie Haze: Mhm. [Laughs]

NR: What’s your dream vacation spot?

Allie Haze: Um, Greece.

NR: What time is it in Australia right now?

Allie Haze: Oh lord!

NR: I’m just joking! I’m joking! I’m just kidding! No one…

Allie Haze: Makes me look stupid!  I’m like “Okay, I got the computer, alright, Australia’s time”. [Laughs]

NR: [Laughs] I’m just messing with you. Nobody knows the answer to that, don’t worry.

Allie Haze: I’ll find an answer for you.

NR: No, it’s actually, it’s tomorrow there so don’t even worry about it.

Allie Haze: [Laughs] Okay.

NR: I’m just joking, I thought I’d just throw you one at the end there. I’m sorry.

Allie Haze: Now I really want to know.

NR: I’ll tell you what, we’ll um, we’ll post it on the Nude Reviews’s Twitter and then, you know, you can find out what time it is in Australia, I promise.

Allie Haze: It’s 7:23 on Tuesday.

NR: Oh, look at you. On the ball!

Allie Haze: [Laughs} 7:23 AM.

NR: On the ball. I like it. No, Allie, you’ve been a blast to chat with and I really appreciate you giving us a little bit of time today and um.

Allie Haze: No problem! I love it, I love interviews. They’re so much fun.

NR: No, thank you. And um, everyone at Nude Reviews, we all think you have a really bright future in the business so I wish you all the best and keep up the good work, okay?

Allie Haze: Aw, thank you guys!

NR: Alright Allie, take care.

Allie Haze: You too, have a great day!

NR: Bye!

Allie Haze: Have a good week!

NR: Thank you!

Allie Haze: Alright, bye.

Natalia Rossi Interview cont.

Nude Reviews: Natalia, hey, it’s Mack at NudeReviews.com. How are you?

Natalia Rossi: Hi, I’m good. How are you?

NR: I’m good. What happened? I tried you a couple of times, you weren’t there.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, I know, I was fucking my fiancé.

NR: Oh, hey now! Sounds good.

Natalia Rossi: Exactly.

NR: So how’d that go? Alright?

Natalia Rossi: Oh yeah. I made him cum like three times.

NR: Three times! That guy’s a champ, huh?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah. I can’t get enough of his dick. Am I on the radio right now, or whatever?

NR: No, you will be after. We kinda edit a few things and we throw in some pictures in with you and then you’ll be all over the Web.

Natalia Rossi: Sweet.

NR: Yeah, absolutely. The real question is, did he make you cum three times?

Natalia Rossi: Yes he did.

NR: Did he-

Natalia Rossi: More than three times. He has foreskin and his dick is like really thick and long.

NR: Jesus.

Natalia Rossi: So like, it just makes me cum and squirt all over the place.

NR: Jesus. That sounds a little messy.

Natalia Rossi: [Laughs] Yeah, we’re messy but he eats me out great. I love it.

NR: Jesus Christ. What’d I miss? What am I missing here, this is terrible. I’m stuck here in an office.

Natalia Rossi: [Laughs] Thought you were on the East Coast.

NR: Yeah, I’m in Miami. Nude Reviews is based out of Miami. You’re in California, right?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, I’ve been to Miami once before for Bang Bros.

NR: Oh, sure, sure, absolutely. I saw you’ve shot for them. You’ve shot for them a couple of time, that’s awesome. Are you um, so what have you been up to lately, besides fucking your fiancé?

Natalia Rossi: Um, I’ve done a few things for Playboy, um, Zero Tolerance and then just a bunch of different shit. I went to go shower with my makeup artist and my fiancé came up and we fucked, and that was fun.

NR: Fantastic.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, oh, and I worked for Adam and Eve a few weeks ago.

NR: Oh, very cool. Very cool. How did, uh, go ahead.

Natalia Rossi: A few months ago, I was set, they’re awesome.

NR: So it was a good experience?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah.

NR: That’s great. How did you get into the industry?

Natalia Rossi: Well, I originally wanted to mainstream model, and then I met Krystal Steal, who’s no longer in the industry.

NR: Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: Who I’m no longer friends with because she kinda got psycho.

NR: Oh dear.

Natalia Rossi: And I just realized I was always open with my sexuality.

NR: Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: I mean, I was always the girl in high school who like, was fucking someone.

NR: [Laughs] It didn’t matter, someone, right? Not necessarily a man or a woman, just someone?

Natalia Rossi: Well, the way I look at it, it’s like, in high school the way I looked at it, it’s like, having a boyfriend with a different sized dick every time, you know what I mean?

NR: That’s a hell of a way to look at it.

Natalia Rossi: Exactly.

NR: That’s actually pretty smart. I think it makes the most sense.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah.

NR: So size really does matter for you then, absolutely?

Natalia Rossi: Oh yeah, I need thick, always.

NR: I’m sure there’s a lot of hearts out there that just broke.

Natalia Rossi: What?

NR: I think there might be some guys out there who just got a little upset when they found out you were just looking for a monster dong.

Natalia Rossi: [Laughs]

NR: You may have broken a few hearts.

Natalia Rossi: What can I say, my man’s cock is just too great.

NR: Oh boy. Well hey, it’s working wonders for you so that’s all that really matters, right?

Natalia Rossi: Exactly.

NR: Now how did you come up with the name, Natalia Rossi?

Natalia Rossi: Um, actually from a Hustler photographer. He’s like “You’re such a Natalia Rossi.” I was like “Why?” He was like “’Cause like at first, like, you’re kind of…,” like I came up as a bitch, like kind of snobby. You know how like Natalia Rossi’s kind of like, it sounds like a snobby name, you know?

NR: Yeah, def, no, no, I see what you mean.

Natalia Rossi: But I’m definitely not snobby. I’m definitely not bitchy what’s so ever.

NR: Well that’s definitely good. No, I can definitely tell.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, and all of my fans think I’m Italian.

NR: Yeah, I mean, that’s like, you know, Rossi’s definitely like an Italian name, so. But you’re not Italian?

Natalia Rossi: No, I’m not. I am German and Spanish.

NR: German and Spanish. But you’re pretty much just a Cali girl, right, for all intensive purposes, right?

Natalia Rossi: Yep.

NR: Were you born and raised in Southern California, or…?

Natalia Rossi: No, I was born and raised in Irvine.

NR: Oh, okay. Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: Yep.

NR: That’s awesome. Um, now, you’re still really young, you know? I mean if you really think about it. I mean, you’ve been busy but all in all you’re still pretty young. Do you wanna stay in the business for a long time or do you have other aspirations down the road? What’s the future look like?

Natalia Rossi: I plan to stay in the business for as long as I can…

NR: Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: But I, what my goal is really, is to pursue my goals with Playboy.

NR: Oh, very cool.

Natalia Rossi: And try to get involved with them in there and a lot of more, new, exotic modeling, definitely.

NR: That’s something you see yourself, you know, striving towards down the road?

Natalia Rossi: Because originally I wanted to model.

NR: Yeah, that was your first goal, right?

Natalia Rossi: I love doing exotic poses that are just very sexual.

NR: That’s awesome. So what’s been the best part so far about working in porn?

Natalia Rossi: Um, I don’t know. Like honestly, not so much the scene, just like meeting interesting, outgoing people, I guess.

NR: Yeah, is there like-

Natalia Rossi: I love traveling, I’ve never been to Miami, I’ve got to go to Miami.

NR: Mhm.

Natalia Rossi: But um, I wouldn’t say not so much hanging out with the porn girls ‘cause a lot of them are psycho.

NR: [Laughs] I can see that, I’ve…

Natalia Rossi: And definitely stay away from male talent, if you’re a new newcomer, don’t be [around]  male talent.

NR: Yeah, it can be a little dicey, huh? That was actually my next question. Is there anyone you just love working with, though? Is there anyone you know, you always enjoy working with?

Natalia Rossi: Um, I would have to say, well, I haven’t done a sex scene in a while. Um.

NR: You’ve been busy with your fiancé.

Natalia Rossi: What?

NR: I said you’ve been busy with your fiancé.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, exactly, and like doing Playboy, like poses and for other clothing line, mainstream things. But my favorite person I’d say in porn, especially in my first year is Mark Wood.

NR: Okay, great. Is there anyone you would never work with again, bad experience?

Natalia Rossi: Um…

NR: You don’t have to answer it, but I’d like to know.

Natalia Rossi: Um, there’s just, there’s this one freak. He does POV’s in his apartment. He’s an older man…

NR: [Laughs] Old man in his apartment doing POV.

Natalia Rossi: Um, his name, I forgot his name but yeah, I would never work with him. It’s just horrible.

NR: Yeah, it just sounds shady. You know?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, like, as soon as I showed up, I was like “I need to cancel, like I can’t. No, no, you are not going down on me.”

NR:  That’s just not gonna happen. Oh man. If you could, um, you know, if you could have any other job in the world, what would it be? Or are you happy doing what you’re doing?

Natalia Rossi: Um, if I could have any other job in the world, I’d like to own my own company.

NR: Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: And I’d like to definitely like to have something to do with the Playboy mansion, definitely.

NR: You like that place, huh?

Natalia Rossi: Yes, I do.

NR: There’s a really, I don’t know if you know this, but there’s a really, really sweet golf course right behind the mansion called L.A. Country Club, you’ve ever heard of it?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, I’ve seen it.

NR: Yeah, you should try and get out there and play if you ever want to take your fiancé golfing. It’s unbelievable.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah, he loves golfing. He was born in France.

NR: Oh, really?

Natalia Rossi: He’s French and it’s sexy. He talks in French to me.

NR: Ah, you must like that.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah. He was my first foreskin fuck.

NR: I’m taking notes here. Huge cock, foreskin, try to speak French. You know, I could work on the French part but I don’t know if I can grow my foreskin back so that could be trouble.

Natalia Rossi: The first time I fucked him, we were in marine bio class together and I like whatever, touched his dick. Then we had like a second, what’s it called, like a trip to Sea World and I like, touched his dick and we got down and drunk and then there was like a high school like lame party when I was like a junior, and I saw him there and he used be all like reggae, like dude. And I like totally sucked him on the trashcans and blew him.

NR: So you’ve known him for a while then, huh?

Natalia Rossi: Oh yeah, since high school. We were always interested in each other.

NR: That’s awesome.

Natalia Rossi: Yeah.

NR: Um, we talked about Miami earlier. Are you gonna down here in a couple of weeks for Exxotica or is that not in the cards?

Natalia Rossi: Oh, for the awards?

NR: Yeah, for well, you know, the big show in Miami, yeah.

Natalia Rossi: Actually, I’d totally forgotten about that but yeah, I’ll be there, I’ll try to bring my fiancé. That’ll be fun.

NR: Oh, that’s awesome. I think we’ll have some people there so um, you know, if you’re not too busy, maybe we could just drop by and say hi. Hopefully that’ll work out.

Natalia Rossi: Definitely, like a little interview live.

NR: Sure, we could do something like that, absolutely. Hey, um, before I let you go I want you to tell me something that maybe your fans might not know about you. Because I know you have a ton of fans out there. What’s something that maybe they don’t know?

Natalia Rossi: Hmmm, there’s a lot of things people don’t know. I’m a very wild, spontaneous girl but when it all comes down to it, I’m like the biggest sweetheart ever, but I am a freak.

NR: [Laughs]

Natalia Rossi: And when I want my dick from my fiancé, I get it.

NR: Yeah.

Natalia Rossi: I’ve always been the horny little girl who has the fucking magic wand.

NR: Hm, yeah, I like it. Have you ever thought about doing a scene with him?

Natalia Rossi: Um, definitely, because I’m contracted with Jules Jordan for anal.

NR: Okay.

Natalia Rossi: I’m trying to ask Jules if maybe I could, I want like a Natalia’s Anal Adventure and like, he should be a part of it.

NR: Sounds awesome, are you kidding me?

Natalia Rossi: Yeah.

NR: That sounds great. Alright, well, I’m gonna let you get back to getting busy with the ol’ fiancé but I really appreciate you letting us spend a little bit of time with you. And um, I want you to know that everyone at Nude Reviews wishes you the best and uh, just keep rocking on, okay?

Natalia Rossi: Alrighty, thank you so much for taking the time to listen to me. [Laughs]

NR: Absolutely, any time and um, I hope we can catch up in a couple of weeks in Miami. Um, take care, Natalia, alright?

Natalia Rossi: Alright, thank you.

NR: Alright.

Natalia Rossi: Bye!

NR: Bye.